Financial Trickster Gifts

'I need you to reassure the investors. Can you keep a straight face?'

'This is Vincent. He's Dutch and he's a bit depressed but he's a master at creative accounting!'

'I work in accounting.'

'Bad news! Your love line stops at your line of credit.'

Mono-Tasking, Multi-Tasking, No-No Tasking and Nada Tasking.

False Tax Return

"Salary is unimportant. I'll just siphon off what I need."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

Propping up a profits chart.

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

"It's part of a deal I worked out with the I.R.S."

Panama Papers Scandal

"Yes, we're a letterbox company. How can I help you?"

"I'm in here...reallocating Dad's retirement account into junk bonds."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

Money laundering.

"I moved to the coast to get away from the Inland Revenue..."

"The public seems concerned about the size of government."

'No, you can't write off the cost of your wake-up call service.'

'I made my fortune the old fashioned way - concealing it from the government.'

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'

"Okay, what if we go outside - will it still be insider trading then?"

"Psst! If you have any stock tips to pass on, I can probably lighten your sentence for insider trading."

Accountant's Awards - "Our next award is for 'Tax Loophole of the Year'..."

"Is that before or after tax?"

"Chris, find a safe and fast way into lucrative tax heavens!"

Cheating Alien

"Someday all these anonymous accounts will belong to shell companies of which you will deny all knowledge."