Financial Officer Gifts

'Ready to walk the Reimbursement Maze?'

'I'm resigning due to fiscal mismanagement...so my last act as CEO is to give myself a big severance package.'

'Gentlemen, meet our new Chief Financial Officer.'(witch doctor)

'Yes sir, we are dealing with your invoice at this very minute.'

"I've sorted it out, the computer put your national Insurance number in the tax due column"

In tray and Out tray

I don't remember your name... but your salary is familiar.

"...That's agreed then, we raise our salaries by 40%..."

"Who's your daddy corporation?"

Number 2 in a series of unlikely events: "There's more money in the budget than we know what to do with so you don't need to ask me every time you just need to spend a few hundred quid."

"Should I announce my retirement before or after...."

Hospital Finances.

'According to this bill my bile was changed and kidneys rotated!

"Oh, oh! There goes our Christmas bonus."

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"Financially, you're in the top third but you're in the bottom third of that third. You are, however, in the top third of that bottom third?"

"I don't mind a little dancing when you're doing the kingdom's business but I don't want to see the piper's pay on your expense report."

'You can rest assured we don't brush anything under the carpet in this office.'

"Great news! We're going to have to make some big cuts next year!"

"Oops! MY mistake, that was the yearly expense estimate, not the monthly estimate."

"Perhaps we've cut the royal budget too much."

Business cartoon on the lack of expansion capital

"Bottom line - don't forget to lie."

"Comparing our salaries with the workers' salaries makes me cry...with laughter!"

"If we put you in our collections department, Do you think you could hound people?"

'That's odd, I've never seen it run backwards.'

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

'Thank you for you car expense claim . . .why are you wearing bicycle clips?'

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"John's our CFO: Creative Financial Officer."

"The only way you'll get fired is if you don't spend your budget."

"It's that time of year. Another challenge to Larry's dominance over the Accounts Payable Department."

'I want to claim for black marker pens.'