Financial Audit Gifts

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

"All economic hope abandon ye who enter here."

'I'd put it on the back burner, but the stove's been repossessed.'

'I had it all - then the IRS found where I had it hidden.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

The day the stock market went UP.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Great Chinese Dynasties

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

The president's men

A fight in the Boardroom.

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

Mario Draghi

Spot the difference.

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"We only got six days of funding."