Finances With A Twist Gifts

Financial Advisor to client: 'Your portfolio still could earn money if you believe in the existence of junk bond elves.'

"She wishes to range free!"

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

"Just because you can go around the world in one night doesn't mean you can also do your taxes that way!"

'Prof. Sigurdt has made giant strides in making genetic engineering profitable.'

Lack History Month

"I'd like a job filled with adventure where there'd be a good chance of claiming compensation."

'Your proposal's on my desk right now, though I have to admit, I've made some significant changes.'

Goodbye Party Today - Prof Whiley is Retiring to Spend More Time with his Inner Child.

"One good thing about a low budget district, the school year is shorter."

"The stock market roller coaster rides of late have taught me a thing or two. Sell all your assets and stick with cash."

"How do we know this isn't a ponzi scheme?"

Locally Grown by a Guy with a Masters in Philosophy

"No, I'd like to have plans. I just always want the option for them to be cancelled at the last minute due to circumstances outside both parties' control."

"Money can't buy happiness. That's why I enjoy it for its own sake."

'On second thought Mr. Akimoto, perhaps we can give you a loan to open a karate club.'

'I had an overwhelming urge to be nice again. I think I need a holiday.'

"Am I going crazy or was this place Korean just last week?"

"Never sell your hotels and try to choose the tiny hat."

Bug Contemporary Music

Hanging laundry on the mill

"I like this one."

"Press any key to continue."

Ask about our Pay Now, Go Later Plan

'You're very cute but your account is overdrawn - Ok, what the heck...?

'Walter doesn't trust banks.'