Academic With A Twist Gifts

Goodbye Party Today - Prof Whiley is Retiring to Spend More Time with his Inner Child.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Interdisciplinary studies.

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

'What rhymes with D minus?'

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"So, in conclusion, I would like to say that although I haven't actually read the book, I still found it a fascinating and enriching experience.

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

Subatomic particles

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

"Just tell your parents you made the grade. Don't specify."

"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."

"We interrupt this program to bring you a special message from your teachers..."

"Oh, my, I can tell—everybody in there has read Barbara Tuchman."

Yeah, well, I only failed my logic exam because I'm a Pisces and my professor's a Leo.

"Do you have any bedtime stories that aren't about the former Yugoslavia?"

"Summer's coming. How does pre-med camp sound."

Milestone in a college student's life: 'Hey! I just got my first collection agency letter, dunning me for my credit card debt!'

'Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.'

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

We get it, Simone. You went to obedience grad school. Be cognizant of the canis familiaris.

"The best thing about winning an academic decathlon...is the new friends you make."

Lack History Month

The institute.

'My teacher doesn't give numerical or letter grades. She gives emoticons.'

"Gentlemen - raise your glasses'

'You're in Graduate School now. I think it's high time I stopped doing your home work.'

"How do we know this isn't a ponzi scheme?"