Finance Fun With Friends Gifts

Friendship for Accountants

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

Looks like another profit's warning

"Okay, like, the good news is we can pay Paul. The bad news is we gotta rob Peter."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

"That was a rumor day."

We only have two things to fear - fear itself and someone getting a look at our books.

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'Till debt do us part...'

"We just can't justify the expense of cheese, let alone the upkeep of the maze."

Bookkeeping Club

'I've heard of cooking the books... but how did you rotisserie them and why?'

'My Dad won't let me tell what I did on my summer vacation...he doesn't want anyone to know where he set up his offshore bank accounts.'

'He, also, rebounded our stocks with our endorsement deal.'

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

'My new investment counselor keeps referring to my stock portfolio as 'a financial aneurism waiting to happen'.'

Strike 3! 'Dammit - all I can think about is that $5,350,000!'

"Sorry, the only way we can afford a 3D printer, is if it can print some bearer bonds."

"Well - that's enough from me, I shall now introduce our Head of Pensions..."

Because of our tightening budget, I had to turn off the lights at the end of the tunnel.

Masochism for stockholders.

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

Canine Bank and Trust. I'd like my account to roll over. I'll go fetch it.

'Do we have enough money for sweets yet?'

'He says its a subprime fruit we can have at an adjustable rate, what's the worst that could happen?'

'I'd like to extend my overdraft...'

"He only wears it this time of the year. It's his har-vest."

FIRST NATIONAL, TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

Snowman in front of IRS wears barrel

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

'Perkins, what about this trip on your expense account to 'Fantasy Island'?'

'After reaching new heights, the stock market closed early due to an oubreak of acrophobia.'

'Well, well, well. . . I see you've hidden several thousand eggs in an offshore basket. . .'

"Time for thaw awkward father son talk. You know, the one about fluctuating interest rates and instability in the markets."

"You lead such an interesting life. I've never been called to testify before a Congressional Banking Committee."