Finance Fun Gifts

"Beg."

Come inside and let us consolidated all your nagging little debts into one overwhelming obligation!

'I've written a love song about big dividend - playing stocks.'

'He says its a subprime fruit we can have at an adjustable rate, what's the worst that could happen?'

"Latest in computerised cash management."

"Well - that's enough from me, I shall now introduce our Head of Pensions..."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

'Dear, have you been totally upfront with me about our finances?'

'Why open a savings account? Look at all that change in the ashtray.'

'She just got her first credit card application in the mail.'

Can you tell me about your 401-kave plan?

A bull among bears

The Man Who Exposed Himself

'Our shares are so low, they're all ended up in Gibraltar.'

Bank loan applicant

Masochism for stockholders.

'Apparently if the banks don't pay top whack then senior staff will go off and bugger up someone else's business.'

'£5000 overdrawn. . . Only kidding, but I did cure your hiccups.'

"You lead such an interesting life. I've never been called to testify before a Congressional Banking Committee."

Research Your Market (But Do It Properly)

'I'd like to extend my overdraft...'

"How do I open up a savings account?"

"Well Mommy, should I sell my pork belly commodities or not?"

Bookkeeping Club

"Is there any way to invest in late fees?"

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

Prison Visits - I'm sorry dad, I won't be able to fill in your tax return this year.

FIRST NATIONAL, TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

Stock Market.

'Forget it son ... these guys might look fat and juicy but they have a rotten taste ... they're Bankers!'

"Sorry, the only way we can afford a 3D printer, is if it can print some bearer bonds."

"Love it!"

OG discovers the first successful means of planned parenthood.

"So you're a serious investor? Lighten up!"

"We've decided to get married, so any chance of giving one of us a raise?"