Finance Fighter Gifts

Stress on GPs

"The market was volatile."

'Activist investors are here to see you and they're wearing boxing gloves.'

"When I call your name, step up to station 1 where you will receive a good swift kick. Then proceed to station 2 where you'll be kicked when you're down."

"Prices may keep going up, up, up, but my love for you will remain positively, and forever, as is."

'Money problem?' 'yes, I've got a huge country house, Two cars...' 'So what's the problem?' 'I only earn

'Don't come too close - this baby will tear you to pieces, bite your head off and drink your blood... I've called him 'Fiscal Policy'.'

'No more!'

Surviving the credit storm.

Students Drowning

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

I love you. You're my everything. Mixed Message Arts.

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"A wage increase to match inflation."

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

Big finger print trying to forge a cheque but he can't.

How many times do I have to tell you. . . you're broke! Broke! Broke!

'You realize, of course, that that's the fifth 25 stake we've now sold in our entertainment division.'

Student Debt

A street fight.

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

"We got the cactus account!"

Damn. Out of quarters again for the Pay Electron Microscope.

'Sorry to trouble you , sir , but did you remember to sign my expenses ?'

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'Giving you eternal life was a hard enough problem! Don't expect me to know how to save enough for it, too!'

Popular college book: How to say 'Send money' in 101 languages.

'Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio heavy on sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

"The nonprofit competitive grant season begins

Breaking Through

Bernard Madoff's House Arrest.

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"