Film Goer Gifts

Cinemuck

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

Herman Mankiewicz

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Bloody hell!"

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"The Eggsorcist"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

'It was great. I hated it.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Kirsten Johnson

Tom Hanks

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"Spoiler alert."

"'Tis but a scratch — in America, I'd still have to go in for work today."