Fifa Fanatic Pillows

"You are trying to block the 2018 world cup in Moscow!"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

I like the Jets...I guess

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'But I digress...'

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

If nobody had invented graphics

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Alternative fielding positions

Football

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

Raheem Sterling

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Big screen TV.

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

'Simply put.'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

Kenny Dalglish

"All of a dither as per usual!"

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'