Field Fan Pillows

The goal posts need to be moved to net zero

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

'Let's give it five more minutes. If they haven't eased up on the lasers by then, we'll have to postpone the game.'

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

Yoyo sheep

"Tunnel of love"

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

Tunnel of Whale Guts

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

Hammer Thrower - "Let go of it!"

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

"One of your delicious ducks got into my yard yesterday."

'Is it true you're covered in genuine pigskin?'

Free Range Eggs - ""I've decided to sell up. I'm having trouble making hens meet."

Mr. Macho at the game... and after the game is over.

Centaur Sprinter

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'To be honest, Bo Peep only lost us for about fifteen minutes, but never let the truth get in the way of a good story...'

U.S. Farm Production: Cup Runneth Over.

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'