Fiber Seeker Gifts

"If you want fiber, madame, I suggest you eat the menu."

"Do me next."

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

"Remember, ladies, if you are doing this right you shouldn't be able to do it."

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

'Gasview Hotel' - 'Dinerview Gas' - 'Motelview Diner' - 'Hiwayview Suites'

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

"They have oat fiber, wheat fiber, and rice fiber, but no moral fiber."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

Sawdust.

'I gave her that ball of yarn...'

House of Beans - No Smoking.

'You're eating too much roughage.'

Yoga. My goal in yoga is the same as the goal of defensive football players. Bend but don't break.

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

'You should now feel relaxed and at one with your whole body.'

'Yes, it is a carrot. You haven't been getting enough fibre.'

A mid-lithe crisis.

The screaming fart.

"My alignment is pathetic for downward-facing dog."

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

'I'll have three of those trout, but throw them to me. . . I want to tell the wife I caught them.'

Virgil

'You need more fiber and less cholesterol in your diet. Throw out the eggs you bought and eat the carton they came in.'

'Looks like you've got enough fiber in your system.'

"It's the worse case of flatulence I've ever witnessed!"

Super Fibre Cereal.

'How are your yoga classes working out?'

'I wonder if we're getting enough fibre?'

Jack the Ripper.

"Sir, do you have any idea how slow you were going?"

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."