Festive Period Pillows

"If this one guy had ordered online like everyone else in the world, we could have had the night off!"

"I don't have time for New Year's resolutions, I'm still working on the backlog from 1998-2000."

'Did you receive my 'save the date' card?'

"We don't make toys any more. I send the elves to buy them in China."

Visiting Santa

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Christmas Tree

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Bubbly

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

Christmas Pets

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

Santa Dog

Santa in the Sky: Happy Holidays!

Prosecco Peacock

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.