Festive Detectives Pillows

"I am a good little girl. So much so that I won't tell the other kids you're not the real Santa."

"Well, of course my DNA was found at the scene, it's Christmas Eve!"

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Frosting the Snowman

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

Classic Emojis for sale.

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

Safe Christmas.

"A nutcracker!! Hey...this thing looks used."

Geographical Society Christmas Dinner.

Festivus poles

"Smile if you're guilty!"

"I'm sorry, Inspector Lestrade, but for reasons which I confess are sentimental, I feel I must, just this once, decline my services to Scotland Yard."

Xmas

'Sorry - I left the naughty kid files on the train.'

Santa never made it as a pirate: 'Yo ho ho! And a bottle of egg nog!'

"Hundreds of looted Christmas gifts. . . A missing reindeer. . . does that ring a bell, Mr. Rudolph?"

Elf

"Kids on the right, elves on the left."

May your Christmas be out of this world!

'What I like about Christmas is that wonderful feeling of freedom when it's all over.'

"If Santa knows when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake...is he with the CIA?"

Undercover Santa

People sneaking into a Christmas tree farm.

"I can't help but feel disappointed."

'He sees me when I'm sleeping, he knows when I'm awake...'

"No more for him, he has to drive."

Santa accidentally brings his mail bag instead of his gift bag.

'HA! Just as I thought! These are DAD'S fingerprints, not SANTA'S.'

"Sorry Rudolph, this year I'm going with Steve and his sweet disco ball nose."

"I think he's trying to pick you up..."

Merry Xmas