Feline Philosophers Gifts

It's resolution time!

"As soon as vacation's over, off it comes."

"Don't judge till you've been up a tree."

Dogs are from Mars... cats are from Venus.

Things my cat says at 3 am

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

"Yes, one is a dog."

Cat Reunion

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

The practical psychopath

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

In life there are things we cannot understand � the words 'get down,' invisible fences, cats...

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

PET THEORIES

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

'Hard to follow...'

"He doesn’t say much, but he thinks a lot."

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

'Don't look at me!'

"The universe must love dogs - otherwise, why would sticks just fall from the sky?"

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

Shepherd, Herder, Hunter, Thinker.

"It's okay. I love hopping in bags!"

"It's just a jogger!" "It's just a car!" "There's nothing out there now!" "I was thinking of the squirrel I saw last week"

"May you love like you've never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, and chase squirrels at the speed of light."

"Dogs are men."

"I do what they tell me, I eat what they give me. How do I know they're not a cult?"

Flea Philosophy.

"How do I get down?"

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

'I'm sure they don't think you're really a bad kitty...just a kitty that sometimes does bad things.'