Feline Fortune Teller Gifts

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Cat in a tank...

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

Asking out a palm reader.

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

Quantum Psychic

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

PET THEORIES

Channelling on the Cheap

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

"There HAS to be a giant ball at the end of all this string."

Using psychic powers, the final exam had been a breeze. However, Madame Evetta did not realize that the student in front of her from who she had obtained the majority of her answers, was Bugs Higgins.

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

Pie Filling Reader

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

'Hard to follow...'

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

'Don't look at me!'