Fearless Exterminator T-Shirts

'Are you the lady with the mice?'

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"And where have you previously moused?"

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Fear of news.

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

Mountain climbers face a closed route.

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

When cockroaches go unchecked.

"It's a complicated time for needle phobics."

"There's no way we can get him ow. He's completely under the covers."

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

"I can't solve for X. I have a fear of the unknown!"

"Yes, Madame, Teletubbies."

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

'Hey! I didn't get where I am by being intimidated by the food chain thing!'

Flies up the ante!

'Looks like we're dealing with a mule deer infestation. I can get rid of them, but you'll have to wait until they're in season!'

"At last, a low-level panel!"

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

'It's not so much you having a cockroach problem - it's more along the lines of us having a human problem.'

What did you think happens to all those vitamins that roll beneath the fridge?

Pied Piper uses 'Rat Nav'.

"This wasn’t a mouse, ma’am — it was a cartoonist."