Father-teen Dynamics Fan Gifts

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

A child as a pet substitute.

'Shortly you will be running for your life. I wouldn't order dessert.'

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

"Nothing else in my room can spin on the floor like a bottle."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

Boy sits at father's desk at work and says on phone: 'OK, I'll have my boys call your boys ..'

Boy on father's knee

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

"We need to have a serious talk."

'You are right, honey, it's raining too much. It's not the best day to visit my mom.'

"Ben, forget... what... I'd said about... plastics!"

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

"Think about it: Toby's the only ram here, so we have to be half brothers!"

Well, obviously we can't live with my parents

You never caw.

"I thought we agreed we wouldn't tell your Dad about the Easter Bunny till next year."

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

'I'm leaving my wife because of another woman. Her mother.'

'You can't keep rescuing him. If he really wants help, book him an appointment.'

'Yoy know perfectly well WHICH corner, Jamie!'

Bears: 'Mummy, mummy can I sleep over at Jessica's this winter.'

"...and then while I was at soccer practice they moved house."

'It's good, Timmy, but it's not refrigerator good.'

"Dad, here's that update on my childhood you requested."