Fashion Ponderer Gifts

'You know you're 40 when...'(women)

'Who knew you could have a moral debate over boxers versus briefs.'

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Mating rituals

Sun Flower.

Totalitarian Humour

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"You want to grow a ponytail? OK...as long as it's not from hair growing out of your ears."

"I'm having second thoughts about those damn school uniforms."

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

Social Struggles

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

Chippunks

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

"Forget the future, tell me what happened to the past ten years."

"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."

"But is it..?"

"How much more for pinstripes?"

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

Made It! Without getting one tattoo.

'I imagine you're interested in one of the more highly visible occupations?'

Smart meter. Smarter meter

'Malcolm is unswayed by post-foundationalist trendiness.'

'If you're really open to change, you won't go South this year.'

'That's beautiful! Where can I get one?'

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"Do you have any questions apart from 'where did I get my jazzy tie'?"

"Actually - he's rather your 'Me, Jane ' sort of boy!"

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

'Gus! Get over here and see what our tattoos used to look like!'

"Is that what you're wearing?"