Fashion Forward Fighter T-Shirts

"Erik- do me a favor."

"I feel like bad guys aren't as scared of me in the summer."

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Overkill, dude."

Christmas sweater alternatives

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

Standardisation: "I don't understand...it fitted us OK!"

Beware of Dawg.

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

Chippunks

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

Social Struggles

A tailor measuring a jacket.

"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."

'You're never going to win any race in those platform shoes.'

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

"If my mother and father had wanted to see Yves Saint Laurent's initials on my possessions, one supposes they would have named me Yves Saint Laurent."

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

Prosecco Drinker

"How much more for pinstripes?"

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

'I imagine you're interested in one of the more highly visible occupations?'

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'

'You must have something in my size?'