Fashion-forward Cousin Gifts

Bitchbark Canoe

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

Rap music

"We have the exact same taste."

"I don't like your application."

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

"I can't see a blinkin' thing."

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"Better luck next time, kid."

'Look. Billy Curry did a nude!'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

"Hey guys - wrote a new song! It's called 'I suggested Paris.' And a' one, two three..."

'More hair than brains.'

'I think there's been some mistake...'

'No, Adam, 'awesome' is not an acceptable choice of what you want to be when you grow up.'

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'How was I to know that my invisible friend was so rambunctious?'

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

'I'm looking for a good summer looks....I can't read yet.'

'Dog Show' 'Worst breath winner'

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

Rainbow skier

'Every time a phone dies, he buries it.'

'Look! There's Santa!'

"OK, here comes Sylvia Sanchez...it's a perfect time to ask her to the homecoming dance."

'Is that a wig?'

'Morning coffee? Now there's an app for everything.'