Fashion-conscious Felon Pillows

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"1-1"

"I feel like bad guys aren't as scared of me in the summer."

'I think there's been some mistake...'

"How's it look back there?"

Fred's Tie: A Momentary Lapse of Judgement or A Cry For Help?

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

The Bland Leading the Bland

"Mmm..I haven't worn this tie since the firms 1997 dinner and dance..."

'I love wearing my little black number.'

"Harvey's staying with shoulders."

'See, I told you this electric fence would come in handy.'

No Pants No Service?

"It's an important interview, so you probably shouldn't wear a necktie that contains more material than your suit."

The wife made it. Why?

"You might consider new socks as well."

An man with an axe removes tattoos.

"You have it backwards. When you're having an online meeting, you're supposed to look good from the waist up."

'It's the sixties, they want their shirt back!'

Ass-less Chaps

'Bob, you're suffering from embarrassing static cling.'

"It's not a cummerbund. It's my underpants."

'What do you mean, I don't match? Everything I'm wearing is wrinkled.'

Hooked on fried sardines, Irene's cat leads them on a life of crime.

"Sorry, sir, but we have a strict dress code."

'I would've dressed better, but my tie was dirty.'

"I know, but my mom knitted it for me."

"What do you recommend for yellow teeth?"

Saville Row surprise

"Whoa, Fred!! Where'd you get that ridiculous shirt??!"

Embarrassed man finds a skimpy dress in his suitcase.

"You wear a necktie with a suit jacket and white socks with brown shoes?? The guy who shot you did it absolutely right!"