Farmyard Jester Gifts

Cockerel sings the blues...

"No one turned in a cow, pig or chicken Mr. McDonald."

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

Bubble Gum Farms.

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

Sick Rancher Humor

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

Shocking cows and chickens with the ingredients of the cake.

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

The Rural Bidet...

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

Organ Donor Card

'Mr. President, you have a phone call. It's the First Hen.'

'Bad news is Tim Turkey is dead, the good news is I've made a wish!'

COWS: Spare cow

"Sorry, nature calls, I'll be back in five minutes: Suzie, you're in charge..."

The herd of hearing.

'Is it my imagination, or has this suddenly become harder to push?'

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'

Animals write 'Clean Me' on cow.

"Psst...The grass is a plant!"

'Let's see... two clucks, three baas, one quack, two oinks, and eight neighs- once again, the neighs have it.'

Watering a plant in the rain.

Ostrich Farm

Bill finally receives a celery commensurate with his responsibilities.

The punishment of a 'SELF MILKER'!

'Now that's what I CALL a free-range chicken'

'I was tired of my goaty, so I decided to grow a moustache...'

'No Dad, that is NOT healthy fast food!'