Farmhand Fantasy Gifts

'This is definitely one of eight conditions.'

"They’re real."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"Yup! Its time to feed the cattle."

Agricultural Psychology

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

A Palindrome Cow.

'You're FLIES YOU FOOLS!'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"Why do you call the new sheepdog Bra?"

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'At milking time, I just love the soft hands of the new young farm hand: A nice change from old farmer John's...'

'Here's a job that sounds just like mine, oh-oh, it is mine.'

"I'm sorry, Uncle Ed. I just couldn't save the poor ol' thing. You want to shoot it, or shall I?"

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Maternity ward on the farm.

Ewe-topia - An imaginary perfect place where Ewes exist, their version of Utopia.

"Daddy says he got the promotion: We'll be able to afford to move to greener pastures!"

Old MacDonald had a startup.

"Old Martini Had A Farm"

'It used to be a dairy farm, but now the milk produces therapeutic proteins, and the eggs contain antibiotics.'

'Of course there is room for advancement. You certainly can't go down from here.'

'Nothing like a cup o' Joe before you mow.'

'Jenkins, when was the last time you cleaned out the barn?'

Rabbit painting a chicken with a light bulb over its head

"You should have been here at eight o'clock."

"I'm off girls...gonna make the most of being an empty nester, while it lasts!!"

'C'mon, let's get married! Just imagine - our kids could fly over the moon!'

'We like to welcome new team members with three cheers and a wet towel.'

Farmer eating lunch on resting cow.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of working with goats are the hardest.'

'Now, son - let's review. This is a cow! That was a bull!'

"The crop this year is 'mashed potato'!"