Fantasy Lover Pillows

"Well, the sooner we get all this lead turned into gold, the sooner we can go home."

"If you don't have any small children, you can substitute mushrooms."

Alice in Badassland

'Fortunes, Impressions, Hunches, Wild Guesses'

"Impressive, Meyers, but let's stick to your quantitative projections."

'Sorry boys... your policy covers Beanstalks, Wicked Old Witches and Jolly Green Giants... but not Big Bad Wolves!'

'Come in, come in, we;re eager to hear your market predictions!'

"Sure, we need more research in alchemy, necromancy, and sorcery, but where is the money going to come from?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

The Lawyer Fairy

'Is that the firewood we ordered or are we under siege?'

'I haven't used a crystal ball in years.'

'That's the new budget team that came on board last week!'

'Make it seven beans and you got yourself a deal.'

'You know this is my first battle.' - 'Really? Mine too.'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

"Flying around all day just won't cut it - sooner or later, you're going to have to fight some evil."

'Money from the tooth fairy may seem like a sure bet, but it's not a good long term investment strategy.'

Monster under the bed (in lower bunk).

Wishing Well - Results may vary.

"I will grant you three wishes. You should know, however, that after taxes it will be reduced to one and a half wishes."

Pirate Athletics.

Witches play at curling.

'I can assure you Mr. Rumplestilkskin, weaving straw into gold is a skill we can certainly use...'

Knight & Dragon

"By the time we got there, all we wanted to do was raid their kitchen."

'Are you guys still watching the tapestry? Why don't you go outside it's such a nice day!'

"I told you they were magic beans and not to eat them."

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

'One eye of newt or two?'

"That's it, now press, send."

'Ethnic origin? Put me down as mixed race.'

"Watch your step - we're dealing with a professional here!"

Work colleague says 'This is great, where do you get your ideas from?' as man gets them from small elves living in the wall