Fans Of Courtroom Comedies Gifts

"What we're going to say to the jury is 'Love the embezzler. Hate the embezzlement."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

"Thank you for the rewind, Miss Cooper. Now let us fast-forward to that fateful moment in February and hit the pause button."

'I gotta admit - this 'jury by my peers' idea of yours is looking pretty good.'

'Furthermore, had a handrail been fitted to the wall , my client would not be sitting here now.'

"The court granted me a new identity!"

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

'I didn't know it was a one-trip salad bar!'

'Oh, objection, objection, objection - what is it this time, Counselor?'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

'Might I caution you on suing the defendant for damages...such action is fraught with difficulty, given your 'hand-me-down' status in his family!!'

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

Baby's first words.

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

"I didn't consider it hacking. I thought of it as getting a sneak preview of their content."

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

'Your honor, my client would like to change his plea to 'not guilty, but not exactly innocent either'!'

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

'Overruled, you may continue.'

'Judge Mental.'

'Oh sure, Your Honor, he can speak. He's using sign language ...

"These days, everyone is lawyering up."

Eleven Angry Men and One Happy Chappy

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"Wait a minute! This is a copy of 'TV Guide.' "

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

'Either it's a mistake, or this town's gone soft on crime.'

'Are you sure you saw my client do it? Let me remind you, it takes one to know one.'

On second thought, your honor

'Must you be so judgemental?'

'I had no idea there was a local ordinance against taking the Fifth Amendment!'

'Talk to my lawyer.'