Fancy Food Rebel T-Shirts

"Lager!"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Thou Shalt Not!

Garlic Free Zone.

"Valet park only"

Chocs away.

"We'll start with the dessert menu."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"Is the garbage fresh?"

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"Red wine with fish? Sometimes you really are a monster."

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

'Red or white wine with fish?' 'They're dead. They don't care.'

"You betrayed her trust. You added spices to her soup. In Tia Carmen's eyes, you are an irresponsible youngster...and I don't blame her for doing this."

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'

Lunch-Hour Highlights

'My mom told me to keep my hands out of the cookie jar, but nothing about my head.'

"We'll get your food going as soon as the exterminators are done in the kitchen."

Melvin would go to any lengths to get away from McDonald's advertising...

Spaghetto

Food that is good for you and food that is good for drug companies.

Punkcakes

'Cookery is the new rock n' roll'

"Baldo, why are you eating dessert first?"

"The Corned Beef Cappuccino needs work."

"Sous vide hot dog round, dehydrated generic bun dust, sweet relish foam, ketchup tuile."

Anarchist Cutlery: Soup Knife/ Bread Fork, Steak Spoon.

"We used to think sugar and spice were all things nice - until that was proved to be a lie put out by global food manufacturers."

"Well, I don't care if it is some kind of fancy-schmancy restaurant...if I want ketchup, I'm gonna get ketchup!"

It's a gingerbread cyclops....I ran out of raisins!

"So that's a three bird roast."

Express Checkout: One Basket Only.

'Don't bother to leave a tip, I had one of your fish fingers.'

"Why, yes, I am 'still working on that.' You know what I'm not working on? Your gratuity!"

'Boy, when they say one trip salad bar, they MEAN one trip salad bar!'