Fancy Feast Fanatic T-Shirts

Champagne speaking to lobster about going to the Derby

'Congratulations, Martha. This is a meal fit for a king.'

Prize vegetables.

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

Church Basement Foodie

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

"Regular service or affected?"

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"Is the garbage fresh?"

Christmas sweater alternatives

'And that,and that,and that...'

A Christmas tree self portrait

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

The other days of the year...

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

Are we human or are we Dancer, Prancer, Comet and Vixen

"Normally after 365 years we'd be looking at a better figure, but not when you've only worked one day a year!"

"I think it was one Christmas TV advert too many."

Great Moment in North Pole History

'This year, I thought I'd try a self-basting turkey!'

'Someplace where we just eat, eat, eat!'