Fanatical Face Painter T-Shirts

'OK...you either wash that off or you'll all have to go home!'

Face painting.

"Too much concealer?"

Face painting by numbers.

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

Clown Face Painting

"Perhaps in my next life I'll be a jpeg."

'Oh, look - a juggling stilt-walker painting that little child's face!'

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

Executive puts on brave face for board meeting.

Abstract expressionist face painting.

People leave joke shop with false moustache, nose and glasses marketed as 'the Robert Winston'.

"You can get good cards but still have terrible luck."

"I think I know where the passion in our marriage has gone."

'Is my make-up O.K.?'

Street painter puts real face on man with happy face.

Flo was mortified when she discovered that her web cam was broadcasting when she was testing out possible new looks.

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

'Creamed beets freak me out.'

'Makeup? This is a tattoo.'

Face painting - children have no faces

Face painting children with no facial features.

Sergeant Stripes

A stick figure evolving into a more realistic-looking man

'Well if you can't make me look like Cameron Diaz, just re-apply my lipstick and touch-up my mascara thanks.'

'I'm all about quantity.'

"You said to hire a face painter and I did! Bill is a mortician!"

'They sat in an etape, playing bezique and swilling skookum saloop.'

"It's face painting Friday."

'Lenny NEVER had any problems with cramped seats at football games - like most people do.'

'Promise you won't smudge his face painting?'

Painting dad's face

Gustave Courbet