Fan Of Office Humor Gifts

"Please sit down, gentlemen. I think that once around the table with the wave will be quite enough, thank you."

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

Executive Die-Casting Corp.

Junk Bonds - In and Out trays.

"A word of advice. . . next time you use the firm's intranet to send a message of undying love. Don't press 'send all'."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

'He got a raise but not enough to help him clear the fence.'

Golfing Boss

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"