Fan Of Contrasts T-Shirts

Snowman dreaming of surfing.

Before/After

"We'll destroy it to the ground ... ...and then..."

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

Look At Me I'm Still Wearing Shorts.

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

"Nice haircut."

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

"Not that it's any of your business, but no, I wasn't kicked out! We had creative differences, that's all!"

The Formal Street Artist

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

After You Die/After Your Dog Dies

"Is your dog going to rip our heads off … I mean, friendly?"

Zorro does algebra.

A horse driving a sports car tows an Amish buggy.

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?"

'I've had it with your bright, sunny, upbeat...'

Big dog little man.

"I'm alright, it's my hair...I need more hairspray."

Prisoner keeping a calendar on his laptop.

Mummy with a mobile.

Worker is confused at the Paradox Parcel Company.

'That dog won't hunt.' Bird dog in a pink tutu.

Workers in Hazmat suits make sweets

Early one morning The Grim and The Happy Reaper pay Alice a visit.

'Have you read about the millionaire who dresses like a hobo and gives money to those who are kind to him?'

Jim prepared for the winter while his neighbour stocked for the long hot summer ahead

A yin and yang sign with dripping paint

"No Chateau Lafite '62? Guess I'll have a brewskie."

Snail Air Balloon

""So that's four for red with black upholstery and trim and one for buttercup yellow with turquoise upholstery..."

An Oarsman

"What a lovely autumn light - look how it's caught that cement mixer."

"I still enjoy running my winery, but these days my real passion is the meth lab."

The Decoded Fashion Statements of Rhonda Perlmutter III