Family Values Enthusiast Gifts

"Am I talent or product?"

'This is all make-believe, isn't it, Dad?'

"Fred Homerson! How are you? How's the wife? The kids? The traditional family values?"

Bryan Fischer

'He helps keep me focused on what matters most.'

'To put a different slant on it, I'm promoting my son here over you all because water is thinner than blood.'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

I love my family!

"Listen. Nobody's cuter than anyone else! You're all equally cute!"

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

It's a Boy

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"Use your inside scream."

"I consider every member of our family to be like family."

"It's bold! It's moving! It's inspired! But what is it?"

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"I'm so good at this!"

Mother's Love

'I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart.'

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

'They're a very successful family.'

"But Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

'I'm concerned that the children may be playing too rough.'

Family traits.

"Do you have to do that even when it's not Valentine's Day?"

'If your boss is so dumb, daddy, why did he hire you?'

"I tried being a stay-at-home dad. But I found out that being a stay-at-work dad is far less stressful."

'Oops! It says administer at bedtime. Guess that makes it bedtime.'

'Daddy, what did you do on Armed Services Day?'