Family Tales At Dinner Gifts

"I told you the service was very personal!"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Feel free to take notes."

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

True confessions.

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

'At lone at last.'

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"No, son, you’re not ‘M for Mature.’"

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

Children's Party

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'Riley, I think it's time you learned the truth... You're adopted.'

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

'Okay mum, I'll eat it all up. But I doubt I'll grow big and strong on this muck!'

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'You were a band geek?! Maybe Max will play an instrument!'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

"But our history was current events when you were at school Dad!"