Family Storytime Gifts

'And you're telling me this, why?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Swan Fairy Tales

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

Little Princess.

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

'At lone at last.'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Good evening, Susan. We've decided it's time you get your own bed."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

"Why did I start the story with 'Twice upon a time?' Because it's a sequel."

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

"Grandpa, tell us again about pensions!"

'Don't worry, he'll soon grow into it.'

"Here’s a book with a pretty peacock on the cover. Let’s try this Flannery O’Connor story before bed."

'Read me 'Br'er Rabbit again and this time leave out the southern accent.'

"We call it 'learning to read', not 'battling illiteracy'."

"The prince, …. what's his back story?"

"Again? I read you your Miranda rights last night."

Sleepy Bunny

"And thirteen innocent logs perished in that fire they used to burn Joan."