Family Gathering Enthusiasts Gifts

One of Many California Gene Pools

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Ahhh...'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

Mom! Don't call me abominadorable in front of my friends!

Christmas Tree

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"Hi-yah!"

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

Polygamists' Picnic

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

'The kids were so sweet...'

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

celebrating a birth.

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."