Family Gathering Gifts

'Kids, let's pause and give thanks to that higher power that keeps this family together...our internet service provider.'

Grandma Dean looked at Bobby. Bobby looked at Grandma Dean. Someone wet the bed, but a confession was not in the cards.

"Now, before we go, does anyone have to empty their cache?"

"Not so fast. I want to be called 'Nana'."

'I assumed he'd know to eat the cone last.'

'For an interactive experience press the off button now.'

"Because we're a family, that's why. You set the table I dial the phone, and your father orders the chinese food."

BBQ

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

I'm so glad we set aside these evenings for 'family' time.

'You just had to tell them to make themselves at home!'

'Son, I hear you failed genetics!'

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

Naughty kids watching TV and telling their slack dad to go back to his kennel.

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

'This is a secret family recipe. Speaking of family secrets, you were adopted.'

"You said I could have one cookie before dinner."

'And there's our little Steven, pecking out of his shell.'

"Hi-yah!"

'This spot looks perfect for a picnic'

"You know, when I was your age, Music Television actually had MUSIC on it!"

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"Can't you two settle this like adults?"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

'I don't trust carry-out food. . . when you find a hair in my cooking, you don't hafta worry about where it came from!'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

"That's part of my Quality Control Program."

"I'll have the carrot cake, hold the carrots."

"He's the black sheep of the family."

'I remember when all this was green carpet...'

'Just once I'd like to go to a family reunion that doesn't end up as a hostage situation!'