Family Expander Gifts

"Thinking of buying a larger property are we, Madam?"

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Ahhh...'

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

'She speaks 6 languages and can't say 'No' in any of them. . .'

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"I guess for me family planning is just a study in fertility."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

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"If you really loved me you wouldn't have called me Euthanasia!"

'Of course if you wanna a really BIG family I guess we could always adopt.'

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

Reading in the family.

'I'm exhausted from too much enlightened skepticism, fresh perceptive thinking, intellectual challenges and independent ideas. What I need is some simple cliche living!'

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

"I like to think that each generation will need a little less therapy than the generation before."

'A baby brother? — I'm not ready to make a commitment like that!'

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

'I've had some strange cravings during my pregnancy. Such as the one to strangle my husband.'

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

"You won't believe it - your granddaughter's grown a foot since you last saw her!"

"I changed my mind – no more kids."

Production manager with lots of children.

A couple with a new baby

"All Vangundy is or ever shall be he owes to his mother."

'So, Bob, I hear you've branched out!'

"Don't take it personally, Dad, but if I need advice, I'll ask my phone...it's a lot smarter than you are!"