Family Dynamic Investigator T-Shirts

'I just feel like we have nothing in common any more.'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

'I demand a DNA test.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Papa Bear was too much, Mama Bear wasn't enough, and I always had to be just right."

"Having nannies really changes you."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

'If Mom says no, you ask Dad -- it's called the 'checks and balances' system.'

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"But I brought you here so I wouldn't have to play with you."

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

I think it's time he left home.'

'Okay, okay - is there anyone OTHER that the bride's mother who objects to this marriage?'

"She may be awhile. Her mother's helping her park."

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

"You work for the family business, and I am your father, not the patriarchal oppressor..."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

"If you see this as motherly advice, we have a whole new subject to explore."