Family Comedies Fan Pillows

"...That old fool thinks I'm a stick."

"I'm afraid Dad did not leave us anything of value in his will, but his last wish is for us to continue the feud with the neighbour's cat...

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

Suffering from Cooties?

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

'Well, he definitely has his father's... Er... Eyes.'

Dad Trophies

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

"Good work Tim, you snatch it all: none of this sharing with your brother nonsense..."

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

'It was romantic before we had kids. Build some stairs.'

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Young man, you go march your butt right back up those stairs and don't come down until you've made yourself look presentable!"

"Remember this about new babysitters - making rules and enforcing them are two different things.".

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

'I want you to bring me one.'

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"But Mom, you said it was a pup tent!"

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"Okay, just one story. Once upon a time, there was a naughty little boy who wouldn't go to sleep."

'Here's what she was reading - an articl called 'Parents can be fun'.'

'I take a cold shower every morning... right after my daughters have taken hot ones.'

"Take it easy, honey. Beneath that terrifying rage is our twelve-year-old daughter. My GOD, when will the wi-fi go back on?!!"

'Our computer responds to voice commands, but our kids don't.'

Spider boy

Is your homework finished? It's almost a snow day. No way

'Mom, was Dad your number one draft choice?'