Family Building Gifts

"It's perfect for starting a family."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

Cry babies.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

The Baby Walker

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'Ahhh...'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

My First Camera

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Impressing dad.

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

Baby knocks old lady out with pram toy.

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

'He has your nose and my ears.'

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."