False Hope Philosopher Pillows

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

'You know creativity involves a high tolerance for failure, don't you?'

The Best Laid Plans

'Let me get this straight: you'll answer three questions, but only three questions? No kidding? Boy, is this my lucky day or what?'

'You're lucky. At least you know your troubles aren't psychosomatic!'

'Well, looking on the bright side, there's only 10 of them.'

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

'I'd like to participate in gym class, but I'm afraid I'll get overheated and contribute to the global warming problem.'

'My website? Oh, it was a bit of a one hit wonder.'

How To Keep Promises

'If fate had been kinder, either of us might be living in the White House.'

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "

"First me stock split, then my wife ran away with my broker, then my driverless car drove off without me..."

Future Desert Islands.

'I am willing to fail... as long as it's not my fault.'

"Hey, it's good news!!"

Men discussing thier weight

'On the bright side I can finally understand what your saying.'

Feel good loser. NON WINNER

"I'd like to announce my candidacy for President of the United States."

'I need someone who can relate to failure.'

"By God, you're not a man who's afraid to fail."

"Helen, I really wish you would respect my creative process."

"Lighten up, pal, it's only a spider!"

'Your years of smoking like a chimney have taken their toll.'

"I'm not a fallen angel, precisely, but I have had a few stumbles."

'I like your 'glass-half-full' philosophy but not when it's a pint pot using a single malt whisky!'

"Don't worry! Remember that God never gives you more than you can handle."

'Do you need help landing your fish Hayes? ... Hayes?'

"Well, your numbers seem unlucky - five and seven to run concurrently."

'Of course, the worst may never happen. There is always that chance.'

Intuition Failure

"....bird flu? No, I want something against the fear epidemic!"