Faithful Sleeper Gifts

'Please RSVP.'

"When I can't sleep I don't count sheep I count my blessings."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

Night-time halo

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"I'm getting red fruits, earth tones, and oak. Amen."

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

Christian and Born again Christian...

Monk Prompt

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

Parachuting bishop.

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

Jesus Christ

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

"The buck really stops with him."

"If you don't wake up and get to work, I'm going to call your mom."

Decisions a Pope makes

Testing the water temperature in the font.

Pope Francis

"But how many followers do you have?"