Faithful In The Final Hour Gifts

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

Christian and Born again Christian...

Monk Prompt

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

"I've accepted him as my personal trainer."

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

"Your sins are forgiven, but not your co-pay."

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

Spiritual Lives Matter

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

'...and we used to grumble about not understanding archaic church language!'

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

Monks play conkers with crucifix

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"The buck really stops with him."

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

'A funny thing happened to me on the way to the church tonight..'

Chruch member about preacher: 'Pastor Woodsley has old fashioned power point.'

'Oh, oh! They're going to give it to us with both barrels!'

Testing the water temperature in the font.

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

Pope Francis