Faithful Footballer Gifts

'With your two left feet you ain't got a prayer, mate!'

'Go deep my son.' 'What's it all about?'

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

Christian and Born again Christian...

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

Monk Prompt

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

'I won't be coming to church any more, Reverend -- I've decided to convert to golf.'

'Hey,come on SIMON, DON'T go all shy now. It's not everyday you get the chance to meet your favourite Footballer in the flesh...'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

"I've accepted him as my personal trainer."

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

"Any other reason for your disappointment with God other than your team has never won a Superbowl?"

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

Sunday Sermon: Does God Prefer Particular Sports Teams?

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

Minister Starts at a New Church

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

"The buck really stops with him."

Monks play conkers with crucifix

Men's Prayer Group.

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

Football Delivery

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."