Faithful Flock Member Pillows

"Thank you. It wasn't too 'preachy', was it?"

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

Christian and Born again Christian...

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

"We missed you at church Sunday."

Monk Prompt

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

Parachuting bishop.

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

Jesus Christ

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

Airports.

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

"The buck really stops with him."

Interfaith dialogue

Men's Prayer Group.

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

'I really do feel empowered. I should've joined a gang years ago.'

Pope Francis

Decisions a Pope makes