Faithful Flirt Gifts

He's gone too far this time. Rudy? He said he's decided to become a person of faith. He said it's the hip thing to be. But he's not totally clear on the concept. I'm not available on Sundays. Oh, come on now.

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Parachuting bishop.

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'

...The origin of the word daisy is from Anglo Saxon 'Daes Eage,' literally meaning 'days eye' because daisies open at dawn.'

Jesus Christ

"The amendments are coming next week!"

Men's Prayer Group.

'If the Lord had wanted us to use the metric system, there would have been ten apostles!'

"...And for anyone who forgot to bring something for the collection..."

'Have a drink while I slip into something comfortable.'

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

'I really do feel empowered. I should've joined a gang years ago.'

Holy phone

"It's the appendix to the Ten Commandments: The Ten Ultimatums."

God and His Copilot.

Dang, another calling. This time, Avon.

The Pope's bags getting carried by an angel.

'How can you be so cheap?'

'Sorry - I've got strong views on Sunday Trading!'

'I didn't know I'd need a PIN number!'

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

'Amen will do ... You don't need to do the wave.'

'Sweet, Caroline?'

'Your prayer is important to us. Please stay on your knees for the next available God.'

"Your prayers may be recorded for quality and training purposes and will be answered by the next available deity."

Flight attendant looking out a lighted window.

'Very very uplifting this morning, Reverend!'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

"You've got a green light - use it!"

Church: Built by Guilt.

'...And the meek shall receive a huge bailout!'

Priests on plane - "We must be near head office."

'Do you realize that you have several passages of scripture right on the tip of your tongue?'