Faithful Facebookers Gifts

Benedict XVI joins 'Facebook' and instructs his clergy to use all forms of modern technology to reach a wider audience.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

"We missed you at church Sunday."

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

Monk Prompt

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

"Any other reason for your disappointment with God other than your team has never won a Superbowl?"

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

Sunday Sermon: Does God Prefer Particular Sports Teams?

"Oh, say you can't see, any conflicts of interest in me! What's good for my brand, is now the law of the land! And the crooked media's nasty glare, my killer tweets bursting in air... Gave proof to the news cycle, that I'm so awesome it's almost unfair!..

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

Follow God On Twitter

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

Spiritual Lives Matter

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

'...and we used to grumble about not understanding archaic church language!'

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

"The buck really stops with him."

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

Interfaith dialogue

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

"Let's start a small group."

'Oh, oh! They're going to give it to us with both barrels!'

"But how many followers do you have?"

Pope Francis

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'