Faith-filled Bureaucrat Gifts

Cleric with bible briefcase.

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

European Union Health and Safety Direcorate rules

"Ticket and passport, please."

Church In and Out Trays 'Lord Giveth' and 'Taketh away'

"So from the top. If they need urgent help it's form AC/765c, criticl interventions are CV/U657's and..."

MI5 Press Office

'I miss the rarefied atmosphere of Mt. Olympus.'

"Remember, report itemized deductions on Schedule A on your federal form 1040."

Auditor General.

"Now, there are just a few more forms for you to sign, and then we're done!"

I see from this you were very good at organising office parties.

'I'll need four character references.'

A woman sits in an office of the Food and Drug Administration in - out boxes marked MMMM Good and Oh - Bad.

"Did you do all of this for me?"

Danger! Snake heaven.

"Did you bring a duplicate copy of your 'Times' obit with you?"

'When she grows up she wants to be a nurse and do filing.'

'Do you want to see the folks from Prague all at once?' - 'No - separate Czechs, please.'

Federal Department of Disproportionate Force.

"Any word yet on FDA approval?"

'The board voted 8-2 to wish you a speedy recovery.'

'If you'd like to instil fear into people, then this is the job for you.'

'Your Congressman is a very good friend of yours? Excellent! -- We'll audit him, too!'

'The outskirts of Washington D.C.'

IRS. In case of fire, break glass and complete form 7931C.

"We don't normally wrap birthday presents here. It's all part of our 'no surprises' policy."

'Oh, I don't care who - Anybody but a taxpayer.'

Heaven: Terms and Conditions

"No, no - first you fill out the customer evaluation form, and THEN we'll do the audit."

"Harry got a recall notice."

Any post-existing conditions? Insurance.

Department of Organised Crime

Do you have anyone whose bark is worse than their bite?