Fad Diet Skeptic Pillows

"How soon can I start her on fad diets?"

All Natural Nothing

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

I read an article about the health benefits of dark chocolate so I make sure all the donuts I eat are covered with dark chocolate.

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

Error in low-fat pizza design.

'What kind of quack is he? No pills, no special diets! He just believes in will power!'

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

Lite Beer.

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

'What a relief to find out that fewer calories don't add up to longevity.'

Toilet roll beauty tips.

"I can guarantee on this diet you'll lose at least 50 pounds a month, until you cancel your standing order!"

"I don’t care what you read on social media, I cannot prescribe chocolate mini eggs to help with your weight loss!"

"I've been on the hip and thigh diet."

'Calorie averaging...with the oven-fresh trip-el burger, you get...one French fry.'

The cake diet.

Health Foods; "When did I ever eat back pain and trigger fingers?"

"I'm trying to stick to a Paleo diet. Do you think cavemen had wasabi sauce on their sushi?"

'I take it this wasn't quite the outcome you were expecting from your 'spot reduction diet'?'

"So how did you get on with that all-pineapple diet. . . ?"

'Just thinking about New Year's resolutions makes me tired.'

'Notice: results of new studies: most of what was good for you is bad for you - most of what was bad for you is good for you'

"I'm looking for a diet that will guarantee my boss will gain the weight I lose.."

"Well you did say you wanted something gluten, sugar, fat, additives and calorie free."

"Everyone knows you can't disturb a nesting bird. I guess we'll have to postpone our diet."

'Our diet pies are truly fantastic - There's nothing in them.'

Woman on desert island reads message she finds in a bottle: 'It's an ad for a diet club.'

The Sprats

'He's on the cyclops diet. He's always got one eye on the fridge.'

"I call it the 'Fasting diet'. Also known as the 'Where's all the food gone?!!' diet."