Fad Diet Devotee Pillows

"I've been on the hip and thigh diet."

All Natural Nothing

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"The saying Use It or Lose It isn’t referring to one’s appetite."

'I gotta lose some weight.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

'The first thing you need to do is lose 40 pounds of that baby boomer fat.'

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"This is Chance. When he first came here he was a fat Chance. Now he's a slim Chance."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'It started with between-meal snacks -- now he's having between-snack noshes.'

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

The Penultimate Temptation of Christ

'What makes the Tower of Pisa lean?' 'It never eats.'

Toilet roll beauty tips.

'Well, if I weigh that much after only putting one foot on, I don't think I have the courage to continue!'

'For gods sake get back, there's a triple chocolate fudge cake in there!'

"I can guarantee on this diet you'll lose at least 50 pounds a month, until you cancel your standing order!"

The Fat-Free Mayo Clinic.

'I've got a problem.'

The cake diet.

'Can you believe this? Now some food faddists want 'nectar-free' honey.'

'Two more strawberry creams and that's my ' five a day' taken care of....'

'None for me...I'm trying to eat healthy.'

"I'm trying to stick to a Paleo diet. Do you think cavemen had wasabi sauce on their sushi?"

Obesity problems in the UK.

'I take it this wasn't quite the outcome you were expecting from your 'spot reduction diet'?'

'Fred, don't you think it's time you went on a diet?'

'To help me stay on my diet, I've hired a portion control officer.'

'Notice: results of new studies: most of what was good for you is bad for you - most of what was bad for you is good for you'